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Marriages are a Lot of Work


Marriage is a lot of Work

A marriage is always changing an evolving and its so important to stay well connected to each other. Its easy to become distracted or preoccupied but in doing so it begins to develop cracks in the relationship. You need to listen to your spouse and also listen to what he or she might not be saying. Pay attention to the moods and vibes of the relationship. As soon as you feel things aren’t right then it is essential to begin talking to each other without any distractions. If things still do not improve then it is critical that you both attend marriage counseling.

Its much easier putting the time and energy and cost into each other in an effort to salvage your marriage than it is going through a divorce and starting all over with someone else only to realize that they will have a whole set of other problems and downfalls that your spouse did not. The grass is not greener on the other side. Sure someone else might have that 15% that your spouse does not have however that new individual will be missing a lot of good qualities your spouse had.

A marriage is not easy however the most important thing is to learn to forgive for past mistakes. You cannot harbor resentment and anger otherwise it will manifest and affect your happiness. It is your responsibility to speak up if things are bothering you; it is also your responsibility to learn how to forgive. As a relationship grows and matures so will you as a couple. You cannot judge your relationship on who your spouse used to be; what is important is who your spouse is today. In other words, when couples begin at a young age they might be jealous, insecure, short-tempered and more. As you mature those bad qualities usually dissipate.

People can change for the better on if they themselves recognize the flaws and want to make the changes. If your spouse has made dramatic changes for the better and continues to improve then it would be totally unfair for you to harbor the resentments of yesterday. Actions speak louder than words so although it might be nice to hear “I’m Sorry”, it is only going to mean something if you see the changes for the better.

If your spouse cannot seem to appreciate your changes for the better and cant seem to forgive you for past mistakes then it might be best to let your spouse go; it might be difficult however if you stay in the relationship and your spouse is not receptive of the new and improved you then quite frankly that is not fair to you and you will likely find someone who will value you and appreciate you. It is never recommended divorcing until you attend Marriage Counseling. Many people seem to rush into a divorce and there really is not need to do so.

Its not uncommon for men and woman to go through a selfish phase or crisis in their 40’s but the good news is they usually regain their feet and find their priorities again. They key is to be patient within reason. There is no magic number of months that you should wait for your spouse to realize that the marriage is important. You will know when the time is right to make a decision one way or anther as far as whether or not you should wait any longer. Its not fair for your spouse to expect you to put your life on hold, long-term, while he/she figures theirs out. Communication is the key and all marriages can be salvaged except where there is violence.

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5 Tips When Hiring a Private Investigator

As the owner of a 15+ year old investigation agency, these are my 5 best tips for someone considering video surveillance.

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